I have been with my lazy, mooch of a boyfriend Eric for more than three years. Excuse me; let me correct myself – ex boy friend, Eric. We met back in sometime of June in 08’ at a Siren concert in Coney Island (this is before Coney Island became Luna(tic) Park.) I never was into most of the music the concert offered, maybe one or two bands but that’s it. I bought myself a hot dog over at Nathan’s and a soda while bopping my head to the god awful music.

After my snack I went for a walk, found a small comic book shop around the area, and then began looking at some magazines. At the time Eric had been working at The Gap a couple streets from the small comic book store. He was on break,at the time I was in the comic book store, so that day I eyed his green shoe laces, and made a comment, he said thanks and for the next couple of minutes we’re talking about comic books and bad movies. I’m a geek and he’s a freak.

Eric has a knack for Manga comics, Batman novels, and The Darkness comic books. He never did like Superman comics since he figured that Superman was always too damn perfect to be human and unbelievable as an alien. Eric’s sense in comic books and broad intelligence made me crazy over him and his mop hair made him even more attractive. And I got him. Regrets, regrets, regrets.

For the past year Eric had moved into my tiny,dingy, apartment with me on the Upper West Side. For the entire time of 2009 the guy did absolutely nothing to help pay for rent or food. Unfortunately the Gap had to let go of some of its employees and my poor Eric was one of the unlucky ones. That was understandable and I didn’t give him any knack for a while. Counting a good six months as a swell time to pick himself up and look for another job and to stop living off of my expenses.

The 28 year old baby refused to go on food stamps because I was always buying food for the fridge as he devoured anything that I put in the box. I have a job (I’m a Career Counselor in Brooklyn.), and he just sat in front of the TV or on the computer giggling away at The Cartoon Network and the Sports Channel.

By 2010 I had it. Sometime around October or November Eric had no intention of finding a job, or growing up. The bumbling slob did nothing but complain about not having a job and other nonsense, waste my electric that I reluctantly paid for, and invite his dumb fancy football buddies over to my place to screw me over some more. That’s it. Not only did I kick Eric out of my apartment, but the relationship was over.

Kicking a grown man out of my personal space and home was my ultimate stepping stone to true independence because I admit I depended on Eric for company, sex (I rate him a 7), and simply not to be alone in this empty city. I learned I don’t need a mooch to enjoy my own company.

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I came in from a job in the Philippines to my cousin’s wedding in deep south Jackson, Mississippi. I met “him” on the dance floor of the wedding. He was the best friend of my cousin’s new husband, so I knew he was good stock. He literally swept me off my feet with his southern charm, his dazzling smile, his angel of a mother, and Ole Miss football games (Eli Manning’s last season there). I even moved to Jackson after football season, at his request, to see if we were meant to be…

Well, that’s when the wheels fell off. Our cultures clashed and his eyes wandered, on Valentine’s Day week OF ALL WEEKS OF THE YEAR! He denied, denied, denied. But, I knew knew knew. I’m not sure why we held it together- actually I know why he did- to keep up appearances that meant the world to him. Given, he was the best dressed and most well-mannered guy, though he apparently struggled in the fidelity department. I loved him and hated him equally.

Ultimately I decided that I had to go back to L.A. and the relationship was OVER. On the day I left, he gave me the only gift he ever gave me: a simple silver and gold David Yurman bracelet. It just made me want to scream for both joy and anger. Why give me something so awesome at the end?! He said he didn’t want me to forget him and Mississippi.

Thankfully, I have moved on but kept the bracelet. Though I did end up forgetting “him,” the bracelet has always reminded me of Mississippi. Little did I know that I would marry my childhood friend, ALSO FROM Mississippi, but the BEST southern gentleman a girl could ever ever wish for… it just took me 25 years (and too many bad boyfriends) to realize he was the ONE. Even better, this Christmas, my husband surprised me with a new David Yurman bracelet with diamonds and sapphires. My husband is seriously the best and I’m so thankful I got him last. :)

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I was a silly 16 year old girl who thought she fell in love with her high school boyfriend in a small rural town in Kentucky. In retrospect (it’s 14 years later now) he reminds me more of a Kevin Federline type. A complete loser who has accomplished nothing in life! My friends hated him, my family hated him, and because I’m “a little” hard-headed I decided to make my relationship work…..dating him for almost 5 years and halfway through college. What a waste! Luckily, I finally listened at some point and we broke up over one of his last cheating escapades. At the time, I was crushed and thought I would never get over it…...now I think the whole situation is really funny!

He gave me this ring- which my mom forbid me to put on because it looked like an engagement ring. It’s the smallest diamond I have ever seen in a 14 K gold band. I will be happy to give it a new home!

Moving on was wonderful. I am happily married now for almost 7 years now. My husband and I have traveled the world, have made many friends, and are expecting our first baby in 13 days! Life could not be better. The moral of the story is: think really long and hard if your family and friends are telling you that you could do better in the dating arena. This “rings” true especially for those of you below the age of 21 (Your frontal lobe is still maturing at that point).For physical proof see the picture. The bottom ring represents the looser highschool boyfriend who no one likes except for you. The top: is not for sale…..it represents the one you hopefully will find happiness forever with (it’s my engagement ring). Good luck out there!

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I was the guest of a guy I had been dating for a couple of weeks at a charity golf tournament. He was polite and charming, which I guess he should be since he has political ambitions. As these types generally do, he schmoozed with everyone there…especially the other women. I guess one brunette with big breasts caught his eye because after this event I never heard from him again. No phone call, no post-it, no text, nothing. A couple of weeks later I checked his FB profile and there was a picture of him…with the breasty brunette…at another charity event. Another dirty politician in the making! Although he was a loser, I was actually a winner… I got rid of him and I won this at the golf tournament in a raffle. Maybe it will bring you luck too.

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I thought my fiance was absolutely amazing. Nicole Miller was in town for one of her runway shows. He knew I was attending. After the show he had arranged for me to purchase anything of my liking. I thought I had found the perfect dress for one of our wedding parties. One month before the wedding he left me for another MAN! No wonder he had good taste in clothing! I have now moved on and my gaydar is in excellent working condition these days.

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